A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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How many fairies does it take to screw in a light bulb? If you still believe in fairies, there's something wrong with you.

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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Gale swallows.

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Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

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you.

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What makes the antijokes on this site funny? Nothing.

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Know what's worse than being publicly embarrassed in front of your crush? Jeffrey dahmer

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Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Your mom is so ugly, that her job prospects are affected negatively, and your family suffers as a consequence.

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Your mother is so dumb. It's a good thing she knows sign language.

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what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

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What do you call a man with a sack of money running from a bank? A rich man.

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One looks at the other and says, "Can you pass the soap?" The other penguin says, "What do i look like, a typewriter?"

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whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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I went to the bookstore to buy me a Where's Waldo book. I looked through the store and couldn't find it anywhere.... Well played waldo, well played.

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I have a knock knock joke. You start.

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Why did the cockroach cross the road? Why do you ask?

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What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

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What happened to the village that got swept by a tsunami? It was destroyed.

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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Why did the pollock jump into the sea? A pollock is a fish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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