My wife has terminal cancer.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

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Miami Heat.

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What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

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Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

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Why was the mexican dead? Because he overdosed on Methamphetamine.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Why the long face", the horse replies I have an extra 21st chromosome.

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Why did the armless girl fell off the swing? Because somebody pushed her. Why did se fell again? Because somebody pushed her again.

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Man 1: What kinds of phones do snails use? Man 2:I don't know, I don't think they do. Snail: The snail said nothing, snails don't speak.

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Q:why did the chicken cross the road. A:to get back to the farm he was raised on

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The pizza guy. Your pizza's here.

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What did the man do after a bad day at work? He went home and beat his wife

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

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Hello, nice to meet you.

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What's better than group sex? Gang rape

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What did the priest say to the child.... nothing he just gripped his arm tightly and pulled down his pant

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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What's green, red, and goes fifty miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She's a women.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops