i came... i saw... -myself when i came.

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Did you hear about the one with the priest, the boy, and the dildo? Yes, sadly I have.

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What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

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Your mama is so poor that she is on welfare, but she is ashamed to tell you and cries herself to sleep every night.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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So - this baby seal walked into a club.

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Why was the Catholic priest incarcerated? 2 counts of child pornography and 3 counts of sexual abuse with a minor. Since he is now released, he's working as a janitor of an elementary school.

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whats worse then getting robbed by a black man? -getting hit by a bus due to not having the needed currency to get a ride home

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How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken decided go get cigarettes and then hang out at a bar. The chicken sitts next to horse, the horse says "Why the sad face?" The chicken justs sitts there, thinking about the insanity that he has caused. "I don't know, is my joke not getting old?" Replied the chicken.

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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why cant the black guy vote? because hes not 18 yet.

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Your mama is so fat... she really should go on a diet.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was in a refrigerated freight truck en-route to its destination.

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whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

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How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? 10 because they're so darn stupid!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To kiss my ass

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How many stripes does a Zebra have? Doesn't matter millions of people died in the Holocaust

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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In Soviet Russia, the government kills with famine and genocide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops