Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's big, white and will killl you if it falls out of a tree? A polar bear.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did Jesus get for Christmas? Birthday presents.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q: What do African Americans and Doorknobs have in common? A: Before the Emancipation Proclamation was passed, neither was free. Doorknobs still aren't free.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a muslim with an RPG? Holy Shiite

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's green and has four wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than people repeating a joke about a handicapped child and voting down original, funny, anti-material? Knowing that millions of cubic decimetres of precious air and thousands of tonnes of food are being wasted every day to sustain them...

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did charles get his sister for christmas? Nothing, he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -8

"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what is pink and fluffly? pink fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Your mama is so fat... she really should go on a diet.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did Obama do when he heard of Bin Ladins death? He informed the nation of what had happend.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Where did John go? Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -102

Nice legs....What time do they open?

thumb_up thumb_down -114

Why doesn't the Athiest wear socks? He has a minor fungal condition on his feet.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Three men of varying ethnic backgrounds jump off a building and yell different things as they fall to their death. They were all very good friends and neglected to have had a trip sitter watch them take hallucinogenics. The group of school children below the building are traumatized for a good portion of their lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

If a stick is sticky and a bat is batty, what is a mountain? A mountain is rocky. Techinically, 'mountainly' is not an official word.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What happened to the power lifter that tried to deadlift 920 lbs while wearing nothing but his briefs? he succeeded because he is trained power lifter.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

equality for women

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How do you piss off a lion? You repeatedly poke it with a stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops