What do you call a baby that got hit by a train? Thomas

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Why scooby-doo likes cookies? Because he's chub!

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a duck walks onto a basketball court during a game. The referee sees the bird and blows his whistle crying fowl just as the player was running up to dunk. The confused bird flies away and the referee gets punched by the angry player.

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What did the two prostitute say to each other? I dont know, i wasn't there

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Did you know that if you rearrange the letter in "Gill Lube", you can spell "Gullible"?

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Why did the boy jump in the van? Because his parents had just been in a terrible car accident.... There where 2 fatalities.

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"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

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What's the difference between black and white people? One is black.

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What do you call a black man sitting on a porch? Relaxed.

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Where did Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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A Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Russian walk into a bar. The Frenchman orders a glass of wine, the Irishman orders a whisky, and the Russian, who prefers to be sober, orders a glass of water. They have an all-around pleasant night, yet they leave the bar upset. Why? A severe water contamination in the town resulted in the Russian man consuming a fatal dose of arsenic.

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What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

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Hey, guess what. What? ... Hello? Sorry, I don't talk to strangers.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

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A man jumped off a bridge. He went bungee jumping with his family and had a great time.

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Why couldn't the child go to the park? He was a registered sex offender.

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There is a famous joke, "What's black and white and re(a)d all over? A newspaper!" However, this is not featured on this website. Why? Because this is anti-joke.com, not joke.com - you moron

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Why did Gary have severe learning difficulties? Because his mother drank a lot of alcohol while she was pregnant, and it harmed his development significantly.

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Connor is homosexuaI

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knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

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how do you make a little boy cry? Kill his parents in front of him .

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The snake rides the bicycle in the forest, the rabbit sees this, and says "hey snake, you don't have legs" "oh damn" replies the snake and eats the rabbit because of the insolence

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Knock knock, "Whos there" a business man who wants to sell you things that you don't need "Oh, go away"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops