A woman is hit by a car. Thankfully she manages to survive, but the driver is fined a lot of money for speeding.

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Your mother is so fat, she tried to suicide because she was unhappy with her weight. She tried a diet and it didn't work; she suffers from depression and went to see a doctor about her weight. Life is getting worse for your mother and she is starting to develop diabetes. Your relatives and cousins are going to the hospital to visit her sometime this week; the doctor says she only has about a week left before she passes away.

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What is the difference between Jesus and jackAwhole lota fat

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How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It's an obscure number you've probably never heard of.

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Looks like you are having a TUFF time recovering from the game.....lol.....

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What did the transvestite say to the hypochondriac? "Ever been to Toledo?"

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Why did Sally ask for ketchup? She wanted to use it on her french fries.

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Knock know! Who's there? Aids! Aids who? Aids! Aids who? Orange! Orange who? Orange you glad I'm not aids!

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A mass murderer ran into a bar full of people. He first shot a man. What did the man say when the murderer shot him? Nothing, he was hit in the head and instantly died before he could say anything.

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Sex vagina. lol.

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It's a penguin that breathes by its asshole. One day, he sits down, and he dies.

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Penis

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What did the black basketball player say to the white basketball player when he lost? Good game.

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Why is the mexican navy so bad? They have insufficient funds to give to their military as they are a 2nd world country.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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A man walks into a bar. -Can I ask where am I? - he sais -Yes, you can. - sais the barman Awkward silence occurs. -Why aren't you asking? I said you can.

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In soviet russia, 6 is not afraid of 7

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock. Knock. Whos there? Not Sarah.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why did no one help him up? Because nobody liked him.

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what do you call 3 mexicans in the back of a car? Carpooling to work to save on gas.

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yo momma is soo stupid when anyone says anything she say i don't understand .

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Let's play twenty questions. Alright, but I have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Shit on her face

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How do you kill a blue elephant? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a white elephant? No there is no such thing as a white elephant gun. You take it's trunk, then strangle it until it turns blue. Then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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