How do you double any amount of cash? Stack it up and fold it in half.

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Anti-Joke is a silver bullet.

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea. A: Tsunami victims.

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. He crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your mother. Oh, hi Mom! Come in!

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roses are red violets are blue i've got alzheimer's ...

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What happens when you die? Your body gets decomposed by bacteria

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am colorblind I hate my life

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What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and the holocaust? A pile of dead babies isn't funny

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Why didn't the girl's ring fit? She had no fingers.

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Q: What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? A: You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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What happens when a truck full of mexicans and a truck full of aisians collide? They all die.

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Jake: Where's Waldo Me: Where? Jake: I don't know

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The man was so gay he grew breasts and got breast cancer.

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What do you get when you cross 3 men and a chainsaw? Answer: 2 and a half men

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Why do all black men carry guns? They don't. That is a stereotype. Now pants on the other hand, that's a different story.

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How do you get 100 Jews in a car? It is physically impossible to fit 100 full grown homosapians into a vehicle, therefore it will not work.

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a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

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Why did Jimmy fall of a building without a paracute? Because he lost a bet.

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Me: Hey frank, wanna die? Frank: No, why? Me: (Kills Frank) Frank: Dude why did you kill Frank?

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The chicken didn't cross the road. Therefor, there is no why.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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