Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

2+2= 478

thumb_up thumb_down +33

The economy.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Me: Knock Knock! You: Door's Open!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Miami Heat.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock knock whose there? i have a warrant, i excpect you to come out peacefully with you hands behind you back

thumb_up thumb_down +9

So a priest and an atheist sit next to eachother train After talking to eachother for a short period of time, the priest discovers the other man's beliefs and procededs to spend the rest of the ride trying to convert the atheist. Incredibly irritated the atheist gets off the train a stop early to escape the tirade. The next day the atheist sees on tv that the train crashed right after getting off, and the priest is listed amongst the people killed in the accident. He is ecstatic, and says to himself "ha, proof of divine retribution," but then he feels confused because he realizes he doesn't believe in a god...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

123457

thumb_up thumb_down -1

i think i have a problem with these jokes they aren't finny

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is the similarety between a car and a banana? Both starts with B

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How does one propagate a humorous reaction from peers and associates while not utilizing such characteristics as whit, jocularity, substance or auspicious punch lines? That's what she said.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A frog found a smoking cigarette on the road, so he/she takes it, smokes it, and explodes.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a black man with a knife and red liquid on his hands? A chef who accidently spilled strawberry jam on himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what has legs but can't walk? a paraplegic

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! That is a joke which very few people would find even mildly entertaining.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

hi

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops