There was an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman... They all died in a horrible train wreck.

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Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

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Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

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Why was John the octopus depressed? Because his real name was Steve, and he couldn't communicate this to anyone since he lacked the higher brain functions and vocal chords required to do so.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! That is a joke which very few people would find even mildly entertaining.

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What did one terrorist say to another? You first.

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A young christian boy walks into a church and gets raped

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? 10 because they're so darn stupid!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To kiss my ass

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Libraries.

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Will you marry me? I'm an atheist. ,.

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What’s brown, sticky and smells like poo? Shit!!

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What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

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what did the pregnant mexiCAN woMAN say while she was giving birth? A LOT of curse words

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Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

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equality for women

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What's the difference between a duck A chair Vests have no sleeves

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

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What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

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What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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