a young mother calf named near reality was milking itself and selling it at pathmark everyday for high prices he got a lot of money out of it and bought a big mansion where he also had a farm and collected prize show cows to show off to all of his cow friends.... he also bought gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons of prize show cow milk to drink to and build up energy for the cow show race coming up in the near fall. Every sunset he buys loads of milk to drink and feed his plants with. He plants lots of grass every day to eat and produce high quality milk goods. He was a wii, ps3, and xbox360 to play everyday and excercise his udder milk.

Chuck Norris can watch TV.

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

Kony 2012

when god gives you lemons, you find a new god!

Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

Sarah Palin

Christians

This comment is anti to jokes.

Where does the king keep his armies? In a variety of military barracks and bases situated around his kingdom where they are ready to be deployed for combat or peacekeeping operations.

What do you call a black man jumping out of a plane? A skydiver

What did the idiot call his pet zebra? Charlie. The fact that the man is an idiot is irrelevant.

What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

A young girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges a few minutes later unharmed and goes about her day.

Why did the chickecross the roe? Because I was bein chased by an angry group o mobsters that 8 years ago were busted by the chicken when he was still working for NYPD and found them all in an ally and busted them for later discovered tax evasion and then 2 years later they found a way ou of prison and tracked down the chicken for 6 years until they found him in road island 4509 lake side estates and then proceeded to chase him onto and across a road that was near by to his lake side apartment and then they go tire and we. Back to their HQ in NY and then the leader of the gang went home and in a depression fuels rage mersiouy beat his wife then went up stairs and threw his 9 year old son out the window and hanged himself. The chicken also died because 8 years is at the top of their lifespan.

how do u get a clown to stop smiling? Hit it with an axe!

you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

What's the difference between donuts and dead babies I don't have a pile of donuts in my garage

Why did the fireman wear suspenders? To keep his pants up.

If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

I'm getting tired of nazi jokes. ANNE FRANKly I'm quite offended

What is the similarety between a car and a banana? Both starts with B

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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MOAR??

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