Howdy stranger.... It is time for you to join! SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT! SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT! Moral: "HEY YOU! STFU! STFU! STFU! STFU!"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q - Why did the boy die? A - He had AIDS because his father raped him.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Whats the best way to take down a skycraper? -Crash a plane into it-

thumb_up thumb_down -21

As a teen girl was walking through the perfume shop, she picked up one called, "Swirly Paradise." She sprayed it on her and sniffed the sweet scent. Suddenly, the world spun around and she suddenly woke up inside an empty bra. A mouse sniffed her and ate her alive.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Whats he best type of terroist? A dead one.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the black man shoot everyone? Because he is black

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the tree fall? I cut it.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What a vase and a cheeseburger have in common? It has it's price.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

How do you make a man sit down? Hold him at gunpoint.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

thumb_up thumb_down -53

What did the girl get for her birthday? Nothing...cause she died

thumb_up thumb_down -123

Knock knock Who's there? That that that. What makes you say that?

thumb_up thumb_down +86

Knock Knock. No one answered, as the person of residence was not home.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Why did the white man accuse the black man of stealing his wallet? Because they were the only two men in the room at the time of the theft

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Why don't Polish girls swim in the sea? The only sea that Poland borders on is the Baltic. Throughout most of the year this sea is too cold to comfortably swim in.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Knock, knock! “Who's there?” “The Gestapo.”

thumb_up thumb_down +26

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Come in" "Come in who?"

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do you call a man with three testicles? Polyorchid. Look it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Welcome to Watchmojo dot com and today we'll be talking about the Top 10 numbers from 1 through 10. In this episode we will be discussing which numbers from 1 to 10 gain popularity and mainstream appeal amongst people from all over the world. Number 10. 10 (Ten) Number 9. 6 (Six) Number 8. 8 (Eight) Number 7. 4 (Four) Number 6. 5 (Five) Number 5. 3 (Three) Number 4. 2 (Two) Number 3. 9 (Nine) Number 2. 7 (Seven) Here are some honorable mentions: 3.14 9.9 1 and a half Number 1. 1 (One)

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops