"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

What is white and can't walk? A PVC Pipe.

Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

Why was the Jewish man put to death? Because he was convicted by a jury of his peers in a fair trial overseen by a judge in good standing in a United States court for 12 counts of homicide

whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

Knock knock

Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

What's the worst part about male roller blading? AIDS.

How many republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Typically only one, though more may be required under extreme conditions.

why couldnt hellen keller drive? cuz she was blind

What's Rupert bear's middle name? the

What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Adolf Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

Yo mammas so fat she went on a diet.

Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

a little boy told his friend he failed a test.. the friend replied that his parents r goin to kill him... to save himself the suffering ...the boy hung himself in his closet

what is pink and fluffly? pink fluff

Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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