Why did the creator of Anti-Joke.com make the website? Because he probably wanted to promote his book and make more money.

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I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

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What makes fat kids laugh? Jokes.

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person 1 - what's big, green and ugly? person 2 - don't know. what's big, green and ugly? person 1 - nothing is

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What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

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why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

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Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

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y did simran cros rode? 2 get 2 uder side ofcurse. stopid nobs

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What is the difference between Jason Voorhees and Michael Myers? One's name is Jason, and the other's name is Michael.

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what did the Spanish priest say to the Ukranian gynocologist? *fart*

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Never again, I have all the intel I need on you, you cost me a fucking eye, you think I would let go of that so easily? It hurts day and night, I have not slept in days, my fucking eyelid is torn right off, and while I use a fucking excuse for an eyepatch, I still have not gotten used to sleep without being able to shut both my eyes, I have a constant fever, you miss me, you are directly responsible for scaring my wife and fucking over my face. Deal with it, cry harder asshole. Moral: You step on my foot, I break off yours, you cost me an eye, you do not know whats waiting in line for you, I am going to make you beg me to let you die! Did you think I would warm up as quickly to something as irresponsible as you? And we do not know yet if you did this on purpose, we do not even live in the same fucking country, and I get assholes assaulting me again! What the hell have you done? If my wife had been here I would have been dead! Moral: I hope you got pets, I will skin them alive in front of your face!

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A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

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How do you kill something thats already dead? You don't. It's dead.

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what did jesus say to moses? jesus isn't real

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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What is pink and smells like green paint? Pink paint

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How's your mum? she's dead..

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What do you call two Ethiopians standing side-by-side? Friends

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Q: Whats Faster than a bullet A: A Jew chasing coin

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why did the ginger start crying. because people through bricks at him!

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Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

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What is black and white and red all over? A zebra that has been shot, because poaching is quite common in many African savannas.

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A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike when you eat them they die

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Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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