What's Rupert bear's middle name? the

What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

How did the thief acquire a lamborghini? He has a side job as a lamborghini salesman.

knock knock. who's there pismil pismil who pigsmil cookies

Why did the Chicken cross the road? He was on his way home from work and saw some youths loitering on the street corner and thought it best to avoid them and therefore any possible confrontation. He would also appreciate it if you would call him something along the lines of Bravery impaired instead of a chicken as he finds it offensive and doesn't fully understand the avian reference to his lack of confidence.

"Ask me if I'm a billboard" "Are you a billboard?" "No"

Two muffins are in an oven. They are then baked at 375 for about 30 minutes and then taken out to cool.

To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

Why did Charlie fall? He got shot 24 times in the chest.

What says "Mooo"? A goat with an identity crisis.

What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

why did the banana go to the doctor? answer: he wasnt peeling well lollolololloololololololololololololooolololololololol i just fell of my dinosaur

You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

What's pink and smells like chicken? A pink hair band, I was lying about the chicken part.

Q:What's the difference between a pinata and a baby? A: One I hang from a tree and beat to death and the other one is a pinata..

Knock Knock. No one answered, as the person of residence was not home.

Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

The NBA lockout

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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