What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

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Of course, the capacity to create a better society, is well within the natural limits of humankind, we do not need Gods in order to be strong, honorable kind, respectful, and so on, we do not need empty promises. We only need, to use our potential as humans, believe in it, and do our best only, if we desire the best results, take care of those that suffer, and believe that they will be there for us when we need them. We can all do it, humanity, yet choosing a lifestyle where we become peasants or soldiers, all promised happiness AFTER we have lived our lives, is what the people have decided. This is the extent of the average man and woman, even if it is far beyond the power of humanity.

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So a guy walks into a bar. Ouch. It was a gay bar.

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How do you stay out of Heaven? you stay alive.

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Ding Dong! Who's the - - - wait - - - I don't have a doorbell.

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mom theres a naked old man outside my window and he stole dads ladder.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't.

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Why couldn't the Chinese women see... It's because she just got into a terrible car accident and suffered a rental detachment in both eyes. Follow up question, why was the Chinese women even allowed to drive?

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A bug in your nut.

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Your mom's so fat, she's is bigger than the average person.

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What did the young Muslim man have attached to him? A book-bag, it was is his first week college and he eager for an education.

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Q: How do you kill a goblin if the fries are next to the sushi? A: Yes. Walruses have nostrils and rubber chickens don't like microwaves!

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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What did the man say when he had sex for the first time "So how come I'm the one with the vagina"?

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1

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What's big and white and can't climb trees? A mattress

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a bad chicken and it burned in hell.

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How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

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I was just entering the toilet in a transport cafe just as a lorry driver was coming out. "I wouldn't go in there mate if I was you" he said "Why does it smell?" I enquired "No I've just murdered a prostitute"

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What did the man with the gun say to the man without the gun? I have a gun

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What's worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

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what is worse than losing your phone? having it destroyed because you were texting while driving causing an accident and you are not eligible for and upgrade for another two months.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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