A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

Why was the chicken mad? Because he was sick of everyone questioning him even when he crossed the road.

what did max say to shelby? I hate black people.

Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "MOOOOO!". The other makes an unremarkably similar noise.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

What makes the antijokes on this site funny? Nothing.

I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

A duck walks up to the lemonade stand. The man running the stand then smiles with a tear in his eye as he is reminded of when he and his now dead parents used to feed the ducks at a nearby lake every Sunday afternoon.

Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

knock knock. no one's home..

What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

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Why did the golfer take an extra pair of pants to the golf course? In case they ripped and he needed a replacement.

whats the difference between a chicken and a grape? there both green exept for the chicken

so a baby seal walks into a club...

A woman is about to buy a house and is faced with a difficult decision. She must choose which house she'll buy the next day. During the night she thinks about it and the next morning she has made a rational decision. What house did she choose ? TRICK QUESTION - Women can't make rational decisions.

Why is ur cousin gay? because ya dad

Why did the murderer buy a lizard? He thought that they were cute.

To the person who wrote the dislike joke: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAH GOOD FAIL!

Why's the sun red? It's not it's orange.........retard

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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