Why was the Indian at the casino? He had a gambling addiction.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up which puts resistance on his arms and therefore strengthens his arm muscles and performs physical exercise.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you get when you mix 5 bottles of beer, a bottle of vodka, 3 glasses of red wine, and 15 jello shots? Alcohol poisoning.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's the difference between a ferrari and a penis? I don't have a stash of ferraris in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How did the black man get a car? He bought it.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

WHO THE FUCK IS NERO AND THAT BITCH THAT CLAIMS TO BE NOT NERO BUT NOT NEROMETAL OR WHATEVER? THEY BOTH CLAIM TO BE THE FUCKING MORAL MAN? I STARTED MY RISE TO INFAMY FOR LIKE... Fuck, when I was still studying, it was a fucking social project to prove that others opinions DO NOT MATTER SHIT IN THE END! And now these bastards (some cult faggot and Some "Nerometal" which are probably the same queer) CLAIM TO BE THE MORALMAN? I AM THE MORAL MAN! I AM YOUR FRIENDLY RAPIST/SOCIOPATH! YOU FAKE QUEERMASTERS! I CHALLENGE YOU!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

You wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment. Just kidding, women are actually a very valued part of our society. Just kidding again.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why is the ground wet It rained

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q:How come we have a black man in th white house? A: because we elected him

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: Whats 5+5 A:10

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why isn't Michael Jackson aloud at Disney world? He is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I forgot the rest, Don't laugh at me...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the fat confused man say? I am confused.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock knock Whos there? The Gestapo

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Doctor Doctor I think I'm a dog. Sit down on the couch and tell me about it. Ok.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are Blue Violets are Red I am High How about you?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into a bar. He is a diabetic and promptly goes into a coma after drinking.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

*Knock, Knock* Who's there? George. George who? George Ronald.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops