Why was the boy in the hospital? He was visiting his grandmother, she had cancer and the doctor gave her 3 months to live.

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Two penguins walk are in the bathtub and says "can you pass me the soap?" the other one looks at him quite quarly and says "what do you think i am, a chainsaw?!?"

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Phew, I was like thinking all like "I am really into this guy, we can like chat like this and stuff too right?"

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i like going to public parks and watching the kids run and yell because they dont know im using blanks

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k

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after being hit by a train.

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Hey, austin, what are you doing?

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YO MAMMA SO SKINNY SHE HULA-HOOP THIER A CHEERIO

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Felix? The Lucky cat? That is the only thing that comes to mind, I am dead tired, but I really don't mind staying up until I cant anymore physically, as for mentally I am getting pretty bad as for company.

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Why do Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles always smile? Because they enjoy there life even though there both blind.

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What's the best way to suprise your friend? Shove a banana up his ass.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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Why did the black women sing to the left to the left? Answer: because black people have no rights

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What is 100(1+1) -100 + 50 x2 - 300? 0. But who cares? The answer is as worthless as you.

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Why did this website get run into the dirt? Because you they let idiots like me post whatever I want. _CamelJocky

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A kid had wild unprotected sex. He didn't get an STD or enpregnate the girl.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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what did the postman say to the dog, nothing he doesnt speak dog....... but his mother in law does.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a psychopath

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Why did the black guy fell from the stairs? Because I threw him

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whats worse than a baby impaled on your lawn... the universe being consumed by a giant albino ape with over sized testicles

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diarrhea.

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What do you call a black man with a knife in his hand? A surgeon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops