Yo mama so fat, that she feels uncomfortable in a bathing suit.

What did the plane say to the twin towers on 9/11 - Nothing, how do you expect planes to talk, stop hallucinating and stop with the drugs

there was a Black and Mexican in a car who was driving? the cop

Yo mama is so old, the bone structure of her spine has decayed significantly since she stopped growing and has therefore shrunken in height considerably. Her face and hands have accumulated abundant visual wear; wrinkles, and has arthritis as well.

What's a foot long and slippery A dick

A Chinese, American, and German were all on the a boat sinking off the Border of the U.S. So the American called the U.S Coast Guard and they were rescued and taken to a nearby hospital. Two of the three members are still alive today and haunted by the memory of that day.

what do a pizza and a jew have in common? they both burn in an oven

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk in to a barber shop They each ask the barber for haircuts of their preference.

Did you hear about the Polish submarine? It was one of five in the Polish Navy.

A Muslim on a plane yells out "Hijack!" Jack replies with "Hello" and the two engage in a casual conversation for the duration of the flight.

knock knock come in!

What did Little Johny get for Christmas?

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could DO YO MOMM!!!

It only takes one drink to get me drunk.

i look around to find that my air head is missing, i then figure out that i had eaten it.

Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

How do you scare a bonde? tell her you want to be her uterus?

Whats fleash color fleash color and fleashcolor? a naked hobo rolling down a hill

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by Shrek

what do you call a sexy feminist? nothing, there are none

why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

Why is 5 the best number? Because it's alive!

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, he malfunctioned and strangled him. Despite the authorities best efforts to free the kid, he was still strangled because robots are really strong. After killing the boy, the robot self destructed and leveled 5 city blocks everyone within the vicinity was killed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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