Roses are read bacon is good poems are hard .........BACON

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what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

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Knock knock whose there? i have a warrant, i excpect you to come out peacefully with you hands behind you back

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yo momma is so ugly, she is unpleasant to look at!

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What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To kiss my ass

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

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why did the chicken cross the road? why should a chickens motives be questioned

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Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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What did Lil Jimmi received at his birthday ? A red fire truck and he loved it

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How did the little boy break his arm? He was trampleed by elephants.

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Lacrosse is the best sport in the world

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What happened after four homosexual clowns all squeezed into a little toy car simultaneously? Children and parents alike were amazed by this feat, and considered their $5 entrance fee very well spent.

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Q. What's large, solid, and full of veins? A. A man or woman who frequently engages in weightlifting and follows a diet primarily based around high protein and low carbohydrate intake

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas? cancer

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How Long is a Chinese name.

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Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

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What's a pirate's favorite letter? R, but they are also fond of the C.

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Why doesn't the Athiest wear socks? He has a minor fungal condition on his feet.

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What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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