A bass player walks past a bar. What? It could happen.

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What do you call a group of black men jumping off a building? Chocolate Rain

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What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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why was the dog barking?? bryan is a douche..... get it troupe.

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What happened to the boy when he did nothing? The game.

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Your momma's so fat...

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas? cancer

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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What do you call two Ethiopians standing side-by-side? Friends

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What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

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How many unicorns does it take to change a light bulb? 17. 11 if its Tuesday.

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Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

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If a tree falls on a house and there's no one there to hear it....Why was there no woman in the kitchen?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

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How do you get a blonde to break a nail? Smash her finger with a wrench.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and Santa Claus are on a plane. This is impossible because Santa Claus does not exist.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because potatos are invading russia

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what did the little boy see when he walked into his parents bed room a bed

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Your mom is so ugly, that her job prospects are affected negatively, and your family suffers as a consequence.

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Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

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a. why? b. because I wanted

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops