whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

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What do you call a man with a sack of money running from a bank? A rich man.

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pedophile

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Knock knock whose there? i have a warrant, i excpect you to come out peacefully with you hands behind you back

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What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

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why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

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A girl walks into a bar she is then drugged, raped and left in a back alley. To this day she still has psychological issues that are directly related to this event

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What a wonderfuuuul wooorld: Would this not be a wonderful world if we instead of killing innocent children, just gRaped them hard and painfully in every damn hole and let them go home? Ad: Consider the life of the poor children, Just 0rape them hard!... For love! Awww... Moral: What moral You see any moral here? XD No Not Nerometal, I am that "leader of the Neronist... whatever" Yes, that is who I am. Real moral: "Seriously who is gonna listen to some kid who is just (severely) butthurt anyway huh? Cut their tongues off! Just do not kill them... For a wonderful world..." <3 (Not a heart lol)

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

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Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

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How did the thief acquire a lamborghini? He has a side job as a lamborghini salesman.

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Richard fell off a cliff. He hit the pavement and died on contact. If only he knew he could fly.

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

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A frog found a smoking cigarette on the road, so he/she takes it, smokes it, and explodes.

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a little boy told his friend he failed a test.. the friend replied that his parents r goin to kill him... to save himself the suffering ...the boy hung himself in his closet

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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Chuck Norris can watch TV.

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A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

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Why did Aodhan not come into school? He was sick.

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Why did the white man accuse the black man of stealing his wallet? Because they were the only two men in the room at the time of the theft

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What's worse than being a black Jew? Being a racists anti-Semite.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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