A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are driving in a car. They're on their way to the mall, or something.

What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

What's the difference between black people and white people? Their skin color.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Amblyopsidae, or blindfish, commonly found in caves where they are well adapted to life in the dark.

Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

Will you marry me? No, I'm cake.

My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

Who's fat? Holly Davis.

How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

The Holocaust

What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

9/11

Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

Why did the tree fall? I cut it.

What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

What's better than group sex? Gang rape

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...