A barrel of monkeys is only a barrel of laughs if they're alive and telling jokes.

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2 guys are best friends from birth, one goes crazy and kills the others family and feel hatred towards each other for eternity.

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What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

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Good to see you today!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

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What did the homeless get for Christmas? Nothing By Nathaniel c

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How Long is a Chinese name.

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

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Q: What's the Difference between Judaism and Catholicism? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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How many dead babies would it take to plug the Fukushima Dai-Ichi nuclear power plant? None -- they are using thousands of litres of liquid glass coagulant instead.

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A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

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Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

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How many republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Typically only one, though more may be required under extreme conditions.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

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Why does an Irish cop wear a belt? To hold up his pants.

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Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

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why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

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What's the difference between donuts and dead babies I don't have a pile of donuts in my garage

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Why was the mexican ugly? -UR MOM!

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Two guys walk in to a bar the third one ducks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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