What do you call a three legged man? Horribly deformed

What's the color of an apple? It varies depending on the type of tree and climate the fruit grows in.

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

Why wasn't the 7 year old boy happy? I shot him

What do you call a group of homosexuals placing an order at McDonalds? Gay

Q:Want to hear a pizza joke? A: Never mind it's to cheesy.

Religion

What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

A guy with no legs walks into a bar.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

What has two arms, and two legs but cant walk? A Cripple

Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

Joey and Haley have sex; what does he say to her the next morning? Happy 6th birthday daughter.

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He had cancer.

Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

What do you call a black man in a cotton field? A farmer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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