what did jesus say to moses? jesus isn't real

What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The brunette and the redhead escape, but the blonde is captured. Why? Because she had a prosthetic leg sustained from a previous injury, and thus couldn't run very fast.

Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One says "boy it sure is hot in here." The other says,"yeah like 350-375"

Q: How do you get a bunch of mexicans attention? A: Say excuse me, can I have your attention please?

So an asian man gets into a car... and drives home on the highway driving at the approximate speed of the designated speed limit while exhibiting safe driving maneuvers. He arrives home to his wife and kids and sits down for a nice dinner while having a engaging conversation about the political future of the United States and his favorite football team.

"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

Q: what do you call someone on Anti Jokes A: Someone with no friends trying to find a funny joke to make friends.

A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Why did the cockroach cross the road? Why do you ask?

u smell oh no of wat?? dunno i just know its BADDDDDDD !!!!!! k.c

why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken decided go get cigarettes and then hang out at a bar. The chicken sitts next to horse, the horse says "Why the sad face?" The chicken justs sitts there, thinking about the insanity that he has caused. "I don't know, is my joke not getting old?" Replied the chicken.

Who's more mean than teacher Hitler

What do you call a muslim with an RPG? Holy Shiite

Why can't women drive? Actually, they can as long as they legally acquire a driver's license and have no existing restrictions.

so a baby seal walks into a club...

A man walks into a bar. "Excuse me sir," he asks, "may I have a beer?" "No," says the bartender.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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