What's the color of an apple? It varies depending on the type of tree and climate the fruit grows in.

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Why did the tree fall? I cut it.

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Will you marry me? I'm an atheist. ,.

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What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

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Whats green and tasty? Snot

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How many stripes does a Zebra have? Doesn't matter millions of people died in the Holocaust

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A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

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what did the schizophrenic get for his birthday? new friends

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I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

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What's green, red, and goes fifty miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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Rebecca Black's new album.

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Jingle bells, jingle bells, Jingle all the way Oh what fun it is to ride in a poop poop fart turd fart, dildo

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Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

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You are such a loner nothing even clings to you, not even plastic wrap!!

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The NBA lockout

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He had cancer.

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Knock, knock! “Who's there?” “The Gestapo.”

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You might be redneck if you are... Indian

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What do you call a black pilot? Whatever his name is, you racist.

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why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

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your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

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What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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