A stoner walks into a bar. A few minutes later he is asked to leave by the bartender because he is disruptive and uncoordinated. The stoner leaves because conflict is not in his nature.

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Guess who is violent. Osama

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What's the difference between an egg and a Llama? The'yre both not lamps.

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What did the snowman say to the other snowman? Do you smell carrots?

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Doctor! I have no problems at all! So, uh why are you here? Isnt that freaking weird? Wow, that might be a problem! Puh! I have a problem then. Yeah, goodbye!

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How did the black man cross the Atlantic? An airplane. He also could have used a boat. However, airplanes are a preferred form of travel.

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whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

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Why was the boy sad he ate a loaf of bread? Because ducks ate him alive after that.

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What do Sandusky and micheal Jackson have in common? They are both white.

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why did the mans alarm clock go off at six am? he has a high paid job he doesnt want to let down.

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How do you make a girl scout cry? Steal her cookies

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i know the best knock knock joke! you start! other person: knock knock me: whos there ........

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Why did the door close on little Timmy? He was getting gang raped.

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Life gave me limes. Now how am I suppose to make lemonade

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*knock, knock* "Who's there?" *knock, knock* "Who's there?" This went on for hours, as man 1 was deaf, and man 2 was blind.

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If my balls were on your chin, where would my dick be?

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Why did Sally cross the road? Because a rapist was chasing her

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What do you call an blank test? an F

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Did you just fall from heaven? If not I'm gonna beat the shit out of you

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Whats big, round and orange? A big round orange

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You know what's funnier than 24? .... 9-11

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What do you do when a sing is stuck inside your head? Put a gun to your head, and shoot the song to death. It will work. Trust me. Youll never hear the song again. Or anything again.

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Why did a car full of African-American men pull up to a lonely, caucasian man walking on the sidewalk at 12 p.m. in Harlem? To ask for directions.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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