Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither did she.

Q: What were little Jonathon's grandmas last words before dying of Alzheimer's? A: Who are you?

What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

How many Jews foes it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1...like... I'm confused that you... I mean screwing in a lightbulb isn't that hard.

What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Women.

What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

Q. What happened to the women who cut her finger? A. she got staff infection and died.

- Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - KGB wh........... *slap* - vwe vwill ask the questions!!!!!!! - Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - Mom the KGB is here again....... - i dont care just answer the damn door - 5 seconds later nobody answers the door....... u here a crash and all of a sudden big men run in with guns - one comes over and slaps the mother while he continues to say " the KGB vwill vwait for no one!!!!!" - every body in the house is shot and and the KGB goees on to tlive normal lives........ for the KGB

Why did the boy let go of his red ballon? Because he was hit by a car

Q: What do you call a real joke on anti joke A: Someone obviously don't understand the concept of this website

What happened to the homosexual jiggalo? He ended up getting aids from having anal sex with various men which is not the best idea because the anus where poop comes from.

knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

Person #1: Hello captain obvious. Person #2: Hello.

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at his genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

Why did the boy get and iphone? It was his birthday

knock, knock who's there you yoohoo i don't like chocolate milk!

What did the priest do to the young catholic boy? Bless him.

When life gives you lemons, Life isn't actually a person so saying that would be irrelevant

Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

a guys was walking down the street in Queens. a attractive young woman walked by. He was interested in here so he said nice things and they ended up going on a date. She had a big butt.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bike

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...