What do you do to someone you hate very much? You kill them.

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What’s brown, sticky and smells like poo? Shit!!

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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What's pink and smells like chicken? A pink hair band, I was lying about the chicken part.

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What did the boy do when he was cold? He got a blanket.

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What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

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Gale swallows.

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If a tree falls on a house and there's no one there to hear it....Why was there no woman in the kitchen?

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

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3 jews are walking into a bar. the first jew orders a shot of vodka, drinks it and says "long live my family!" the second jew orders a shot of whiskey, drinks it and says "long live my friends" the third jew orders water, because he is the one that is driving tonight.

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what did the little boy see when he walked into his parents bed room a bed

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What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

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This guys walks in a forest and meets a bear. So he says : - Yo yo, whattup, bear ? And the bear says "ROAR!" Because he's a bear.

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Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

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What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

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A young girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges a few minutes later unharmed and goes about her day.

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What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

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How did the thief acquire a lamborghini? He has a side job as a lamborghini salesman.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.

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knock knock. who's there pismil pismil who pigsmil cookies

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It's raining, it's pouring The old man is snoring He went to bed, he bumped his head Got a brain hemorrhage and died in his sleep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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