What did the bacon say to Sam's eggs? Why are you green?

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What happened when the wife refused to make her husband a sandwich? Since he was paralyzed from the neck down, he starved to death.

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Q: What's Funnier than a baby spinning around a pole at 300 MPH? A: Stopping it with a shovel.

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When would you find a Mexican, Asian, Black and white guy hanging out? Never

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The EPA.

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Mom: Uncle toms coming home from the war Jimmy: What are we going to do Mom: Bury his coffin he hit a land mine .............. Jimmy: ^O^

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there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

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You played so good! No, I played well. Okay??

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? You Know. You Know who?.......GOODBYE!

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how do you save a black man ... u don't

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Duck: got any grapes? Lemonade Seller: no the duck waddeld away and never came back for the guy has no grapes

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Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

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A bear goes to target, soon after animal control came and put it in a nearby zoo

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What did one wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls are inanimate objects and thus incapable of conversing with one another.

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Ask me if I like pie. Do you like pie? OF COURSE!!!!!

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Up High. *high fives* In The Middle *high fives* Down Low *high fives* In the Grass *high fives* You've been diagnosed with prostate cancer.

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hi

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What did the blind quadriplegic get for Christmas? Cancer.

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whats black and white with red all over. something that's black and white with red all over.

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What did the unicorn eat for a snack? Nothing. Unicorns are a majestic fiction animal.

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Will nearis is here! Get it

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If Jimmy had 5 apples and his brother had 5 apples then their father would have been married to their mother before they were born.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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