Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

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What is black and burns really well? charcoal.

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What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

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Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

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Knock knock! Who's there? F*ck. F*ck who? F*ck you.

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Paddy Englishmen, Paddy Irishmen and Paddy Scotsman walk into a bar. They realise that they all share a common name and make a casual joke about it.

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Did you hear about the man who swam to the bottom of the ocean? He drowned

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How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

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Q: How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? A: That's not funny.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming and it seemed like a safe time to cross

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How did the hillbilly fix his PC? He brought it to Wal-Mart and got a diagnostics from an expert then installed anti virus software.

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We decided to post a joke on anti-joke and see if we can get any rapings

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What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

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what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

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Q: How do you kill a goblin if the fries are next to the sushi? A: Yes. Walruses have nostrils and rubber chickens don't like microwaves!

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why was the blonde confused? because she was born with a low IQ making her mentally retarded.

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A bear walks in a restaurant and asks for a table for one. Meanwhile, everyone else in the restaurant is freaking out because there is a bear in there

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9 8 7

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What did the gay kid in high school say? I'm straight.

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My friends new nickname is hawk-eye! He is a jackass...

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A neutron walked into a bar and asked "how much for a drink?" The bartender did not reply because a neutron is so small he didn't notice that it even entered.

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Two latino men are drinking at a bar. Suddenly, one man falls off his barstool, unconscious. Later that day, he was diagnosed with pancreatitis, and died never having dealt with his severe alcoholism.

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What do Helen Keller and Beethoven have in common? They both died wondering what the hell their last words were.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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