What has four wheels and flies? A pile of poop that's on four wheels.

What's blue and looks just like water? Water.

man: im hungry can i have a sandwich wife: go make one man: then what are you gonna do

Pandas Everywhere!!!

Why was the boy with no arms and legs crying? He had a lit match in his anus.

Q: Whats the worst thing to drop in a prison shower? A: An exploding nail gun

Why are anti jokes so funny? Because they are not

How do you get a woman to stop nagging? Smack her in the face.

How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? None. Babies shouldn't be changing light bulbs.

Did you hear about the three Arabs that hijacked a plane? They drove it into the Pentagon.

Roses are flowers.

Knock Knock! Who's There? Tourettes Kid. Touret- FUCK SHIT!

Why did the sheriff cross the road? Cuz I told him to.

What did the oncologist say to his patient? You have terminal cancer.

How do you know if someone is vegan? They'll tell you.

How does an Asian person get overweight? By eating food with a great amount of calories and not burning then off in time.

Billy: Hey hey hey!!!!! wanna hear a dirty joke? Joe: Sure Billy: A pig fell in the mud

Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? The kickstand was broken and the child whom of which owned the bicycle no longer had the need for training wheels.

Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

Why did the TV not turn off? You need to use a remote.

Why is there a corpse in this TV box? Bob was never a great skydiver.

What do you get a kid with no arms for Christmas? Hungry, Hungry Hippos.

What do you call a kid with no friends? ....a Sandy Hook survivor

What Do You Call A Fake Noodle? ----An Impastaaa!!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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