a black man walked into a black bar. what color was the bar afterwards? the same color. its a drinking spot not a pole

What is the worst place to be in race if you're racing with me Behind me

what's purple and plastic purple plastic

I just drank a cola.

What did the snake say to the rat?

Why did the clown have a heart attack? He had long term heart problems.

What's big and gray and can't climb a tree? A parking lot.

What did the girl say to the guy who poked her on Facebook? You poked me.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No. Oh don't worry then.

Hey, I'm Schrödinger, and this is crazy! But here's a sealed box... the cat lives, maybe...

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have 2 legs

What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

Why didn't the black man finish his lunch? He wasn't hungry

Why was the boy crying? His parents were brutally burned to death in a fiery car accident.

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

Giant scorpions, red roses, adoption, the holocaust, bars, changing light bulbs, and fridges.

Q: How do you fit 30 Jews in one car? A: Two in the front, two in the back, and the rest in the ash tray.

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

A man walks into a bar and gets drink

What do you call a dinosaur that doesn't lay eggs? A male dinosaur

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

What do you call a black man that steal from your shop? A thief

what do you call an old man missing a toe? a diabetic.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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