how would you feel when your girlfriend dumps you really bad because she just dumped you man!!!1

Q: Why was the mexican mowing the lawn? A: Because the grass was too tall

Q: What do you say to a person in a wheelchair who fall downs the stairs? A: Nothing because most likely they would take an elevator.

Last night I had a lovely chicken burger I had no mayo left so had to make do with coleslaw but enjoyed it anyway.

Why do dead babies go to funerals? They don't.

Replacement Referees

identical jokes get different votes.

Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

Your moma is so fat, that Jabba the Hutt says: "Damn!!!"

Your mom.

How many Russians can you fit in a Mini Cooper? It depends on how big they are.

Okay, but lets write a contract, if you regret your decision at anytime, you get it all back, minus what I have spent of course, both I and my wife have always wanted to live in a house by the sea, hopefully you nearby. You know, I have never been truly happy because I thought I could change this world, now I know that I tried and failed, maybe I can change myself instead, they say that true change comes from within.

What did Mitch say to joe when he saw his fly was down? Nothing because he's a bagle

Duck: got any grapes? Lemonade Seller: no the duck waddeld away and never came back for the guy has no grapes

Why did Sarah fall of the swing, she had no arms. Knock Knock Who’s there? Not Sarah.

Why couldn't the boy hide his penis? Circumcision.

What's the difference between an orange? A bicycle because a vest doesn't have any sleeves.

What's liquid, clear, and tastes like water? H20

What is the differnece between the chair and the pot? You can't cook in the chair.

teacher:humpty dumpty sat on a wall.... me: wait, why was he up there ms.park? teacher: well hes never been the same since vietnam, his wife divorced him and now hes a raging alcoholic.

Why did the man put his money in the freezer? hes retarded.

What's the best use for a van full of candy? Donating it to an orphanage.

AIDS

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reading the dumbass things that people come up with as an answer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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