A man gets pushed in to a pole...

Whats worse than having a parking cone rammed up your ass? Realizing that a big orange cone is up your ass.

A man was driving down the road and was swerving, a cop stops him and asks him to walk in a straight line, believing him to be drunk. The man replies "I can't, I've been blind since I was a child."

What is similar about a white person and a white fence? Mexicans jump them.

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

The last joke I tried to submit used "trolololol" as the enter code thing and I spelled it without the extra "lol" The lolz have got me again *this time it asked me for "basket case"

Knock knock. Who's there? It's the government, your home is being repossessed.

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josh Roberts you speccy CUNT

what do you call ten white people on a bench ten white people sitting on a bench, possibly eating their lunch

How many women does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Usually just one, and a ladder.

do you know whats worse than a bad joke on antijoke.com the holocaust.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I've got a shotgun, Give me the money.

Q: What's the difference between a polar bear and a washing machine? A: Many things.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Want to hear the funniest joke in the world? I forget how it goes but it ends with the abolishment of slavery.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing he died.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She got her arms cut off. Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

When geese fly in the "V" shape, why is one side longer than the other? There are more geese on that side.

Did you hear about the new brand of shovel? Yeah, it's pretty groundbreaking.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

Why did the Chicken cross the road? The light was red, which prompted the chicken to cross safely.

what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing?

A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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