what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer what did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that long.

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How many squirrels does it take to drive a refrigerator 10 quarts per elephant? Vanilla Cake

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A neutron walked into a bar and asked "how much for a drink?" The bartender did not reply because a neutron is so small he didn't notice that it even entered.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler... Time to go to Aushcwitz

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

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m

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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What do you call an Arab driving a Plane? A Pilot.

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what are three short words? i a am

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A- Why did the chicken cross the road? B- I honestly do not care.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a pile of shit. I don't have a pile of shit in my garage.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, He gave me AIDS, And I gave them to you!

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how do you make a quiet person talk? you water-board them

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How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw in the light bulb and one to suck my dick.

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What's red and shiny? Not the holocaust

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What happened to the woman who walked down a dark alley way? She found a lolly.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Wristwatch! Wristwatch who? Orange ya glad I didn't say banana

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How do Mexicans like their eggs? It's a matter of personal opinion, of course.

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Q:What do you call chocolate without a gag reflex? A: Choc-o-late (Choke a lot)

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How do you wake a clown up? By pouring vinegar in his eyes.

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My Boyfriend

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Who gives a shit? Justin Beiber.

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A Blonde, Brunnette, and red head are on the beach. They find a sand gene and are each granted a wish. The Brunnette wishes for a yot. The Red Head wishes to never again get sun burn. The Blonde wishes for more sun. The world is overtaken and insinerated by the sun. An alien spaceship finds the Red head in a space suit floating around randomly when they ask how she survived she says "I don't sun burn"

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what starts with F and ends with ead? Fred was walking to school one day when he heard a strange noise in a tree. He walked up to the tree, looked up, and saw a cat. Fred was late for class, so he decided to go to school and help the cat out after school. Eight hours later, Fred came up to the tree and looked up to see if the cat was there. It wasn't. The cat was lying next to the tree, dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops