What do you call a fly with no wings? Joseph

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a group of black men jumping off a building? Chocolate Rain

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock Knock. Who's there? The pizza guy. Your pizza's here.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A cannibal wearing a sport coat, grey slacks, and a pink tie walks into a bar holding a duck in one hand, a chicken in the other, and chewing on a human arm. He is subsequently shot by one of the patrons. There's a concealed weapons law here.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man walks into a bar and says: "ouch!"

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Runescape.

thumb_up thumb_down -89

What's the difference between a duck? An armchair, because a vest has no sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down -111

what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

What do you call two Ethiopians standing side-by-side? Friends

thumb_up thumb_down +52

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? An Irish wedding is the celabration of two people joining in matrimony, and an Irish funeral is a somber rememberence of a deceased person.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't; numbers cannot experience emotions.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops