What do you call an Italian baby born with an extra toe? He was named Vincent Antonio Linguini and has been doing well with six toes.

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Hello, nice to meet you.

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What do you call a group of homosexuals placing an order at McDonalds? Gay

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They brutally whipped and tortured her.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

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what did the pregnant mexiCAN woMAN say while she was giving birth? A LOT of curse words

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So an asian man gets into a car... and drives home on the highway driving at the approximate speed of the designated speed limit while exhibiting safe driving maneuvers. He arrives home to his wife and kids and sits down for a nice dinner while having a engaging conversation about the political future of the United States and his favorite football team.

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What do birds need when they're sick? Medical attention

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One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

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lebron

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

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What type of cheese is not your cheese? The cheese that belongs to another person.

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What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

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What do super heroes say after they beat the villain? Nothing, super heroes are not real.

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Obama 2012

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Roses are gray, violets are gray, everything's gray, bitch im a dog.

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what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

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A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a grocery store. As they walk past the meat section, the Priest stops, smiles, and turns to the Rabbi. "Feeling Hungry?" The Rabbi reaches down and picks up a pack of Koscher hotdogs.

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A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

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Why do u call a book a book??? Cause it is a book!!!

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Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

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A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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