What did red say to yellow? Move over orange is coming now.

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Why did the kid fall? He got pushed off of a building

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Who has two thumbs and is happy? This girl! You're a girl?

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returns and says, "My friend does not have a pulse, so I stand by my prior assumption that he is dead."

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Q: Whats worse than 5,000,000 African Americans being killed? A: 1 White person being killed

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So there's this guy, and he's trying to screw in a lightbulb, right? Well, he did it. Hoorah. His wife was proud.

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Knock Knock Whos there Me Oh, come in

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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If 6 is afraid of 7, what is 7 afraid of? ...Chuck Norris.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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How do you get five black men in a car? You offer them a good deal, then show them the car fax.

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whats a great gift to share with small children? Ebola

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What did Grandma Sally give Little Timmy for Christmas? Herpes

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I man walks into a bar. He drinks four beers, gives the bartender his keys, and takes a cab home. The next day he gets his best friend to drop him off at the bar, picks up his car, and is three minutes early to work.

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Why did Emily sit in a lonely corner? Because she just wanted to okay!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate your mom.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're a faggot.

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in china a dog was being cooked on the grill he was seasoned ans eaten by a black man

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he...

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If God created the world, including man kind, why do we worship him? We are corrupt, selfcentered, animal slaughterers. He made us this. So, Why?

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What's better then one dead baby in a tub? Many things a dead baby is a tragedy.

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What Mistake Do Ghosts make? None ghosts dont exist..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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