3 jews are walking into a bar. the first jew orders a shot of vodka, drinks it and says "long live my family!" the second jew orders a shot of whiskey, drinks it and says "long live my friends" the third jew orders water, because he is the one that is driving tonight.

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Knock, knock! “Who's there?” “The Gestapo.”

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What is white and can't walk? A PVC Pipe.

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what did the little boy see when he walked into his parents bed room a bed

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Where does the king keep his armies? In a variety of military barracks and bases situated around his kingdom where they are ready to be deployed for combat or peacekeeping operations.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

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What do you call a boy that fell off a ferry? Extremely unlucky, since one of the other passengers noticed and the captain turned the ferry around, threw him a ladder, and pulled him aboard. Also he died of hepatitis because his mother was too poor to afford condoms, so he was born with it.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Q: What did the boy do when his mom asked him to put away his clothes? A: Yes. PS: If that wasn't funny to you, then go f**k off. You clearly don't have any sence of humor and you should see someone about that, like a mental health doctor.

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i'm a loser with body odor.. plus i play pokemon to pass the time because reality is just to horrible to face. guess who? josh wood.

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Person 1. Knock-knock. Person 2. Who's there? Person 1. The doctor. Person 2. The doct-- Person 1. You have cancer and have about three weeks to live.

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Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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What do you call a man who leaves his wife and kids to be with another woman? A dick.

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What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

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What's sad about four black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? Jerome never wanted it to end like this. James, his best friend, was drunk... Again. That was just the way he was. He got wasted, did something stupid, apologized, and then did it again. But this time, there would be no next time. They were supposed to be going to their graduation party, but instead, James fell asleep at the wheel. The cliff was rapidly approaching, and the doors were locked. All Jerome could do now was pray. Also, the Cadillac costed a lot.

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Why do black people always say to the left to the left... because they don't have rights.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trash can? 12- 18 (depending on size) I know this because i use to work at a abortion clinic

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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yo mama so fat that she should be concerned because diabetes is a serious issue

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Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Grandma's dead. call the paramedics.

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A fat man on a moped

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Skittles are tasteless. Why? You can't taste the rainbow.

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What did the homeless get for Christmas? Nothing By Nathaniel c

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What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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