I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

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What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

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roses are red, violets are blue when ever l flush the toilet i think of you

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Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

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What did St. Mary Magdalene tell Pontius Pilate during the crucifixion of Christ? All this chaos is making me CROSS-eyed!

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One time i was sitting down

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What is black and white and red all over? A zebra that has been shot, because poaching is quite common in many African savannas.

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2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

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Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

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Why is it bees travel in formation, one side is longer than the other? ... There are more bees on one side

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A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

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i'm a loser with body odor.. plus i play pokemon to pass the time because reality is just to horrible to face. guess who? josh wood.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

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A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

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Richard fell off a cliff. He hit the pavement and died on contact. If only he knew he could fly.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer.

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Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

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Why do people discriminate against black people? Because they show an undeserving amount of disrespect towards the rest of the world and why should they get anything better than what they offer.

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What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

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Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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What is the biggest lie of 2011? "I do"- Kim kardashian

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Yo Momma's so old... She has lived a great life and you should be very proud of her even though she is slowly dying of a degenerative disease.

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What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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