How do you make seven an even number? You don't, it's impossible.

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What 2 differences does a potato have in common? They both have very thin skin.

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So 185 cowboys walk into a bar and the bartender says "I can't serve 185 cowboys!" The cowboys ask why not and the bartender says "Because that would exceed the legal maximum occupancy of this building."

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"Really, how is your wife?" "You know she's dead right?" "Cool mine too!" They high five in mid air and lived happily ever after

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Roses are red, violets are blue. You're dog is dead. And so is your family.

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Two people were playing Monopoly. One was a blonde and one was black. The blonde said, "your turn".

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What did the 80 year old man do to celebrate valentines day with his wife? Nothing, Alzheimer's made him forget about Valentines day.....and that he was married. What did his wife do for Valentines day? Killed herself.

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My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

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Why did the prince kiss his beloved just before going into battle? Intermission.

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LET'S PLAY CARDS SHUFFLE THE DECK *person with a deck-patio* no please don't

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

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Why didn't the boy cross the street? He didn't have legs

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A joke.

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Why doesn't a chicken wear pants? Because, there are no tailors in the area who make pants suitable for chickens to wear.

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Why did the garbage man cross the road? He was doing his job.

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Yo mamma's so fat that the gravity required to keep her on the ground is significantly smaller than an average sized human.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I personally really do not know

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The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

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Why does Chuck Norris own a can named Chuck Norris? because he is self-centered due to all the attention payed to him for virtually no reason at all.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

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How do you make Samuel L. Jackson cry? Trick question...Samuel L. Jackson don't cry. ever...

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How do chinese families name their children I belive it would be child because chinese families are only allowed 1 child

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Q: Why was the black man good at basketball? A: because he practiced

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I would like a rum and............ Coke." The bartender asks, curiously, "What's up with the big pause?" The bear looks down at his paws, embarrassed, and mumbles under his breath, "social anxiety."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops