Imagine a scenario Add a Rhubarb Crumble into your scenario Add your mother and father sitting together watching the news in your scenario. Your scenario should take place in an old people's home Add an Olympic athlete doing the splits into your scenario If there were any crane-flies in your scenario, be sure to subtract them at once. Divide your scenario by two. Your scenario should now be a mental image of flying horses and a hippopotamus eating a large salmon mousse. There will be a pig tied to a pair of sunglasses.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did FiddleBob Joe chuck a stick of butter out the window? Because he wanted to see a butter fly

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's good about having alzheimers? You meet new people every day!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I can't make my mind about the debate on legalisation of marijuana. Some days I think it's a good thing. Somes days I think it's a bad thing. And some days, I don't think about it at all and I just think it's a very nice day.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Remember Y2K? That could have been bad.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a bar, drinks, then leaves the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Dude, i know this guy, who knew this guy named Ben, who knew this guy named Valen, who knew this guy named Chad and he said.... Ben's Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do men like most of all? Let's not lie, BOOBIES!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Children and bretheren, stinky cheese Stinkyy cheeeese. Like this or you will smell stinky cheese in your bedroom

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what happens when you put nina and harry in the same room. Nina will die instantly of shock

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's black and white and red all over? An embarrassed skunk.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A zebra and a giraffe are out in a safari and they see some humans. And then the cow, was drinking, the man was milking the drink, when the giraffe was going to buy some milk. She said, the was yeah okay.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

mike:what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas tom:cancer ahahahaha mike:he got a skateboard jerk nararrator: this skate board will be worth less because he has no legs

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? He saw a bottle of Faygo on the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

It's red or yellow but most likely grey, and when its hit your eye you are dead? A train :)

thumb_up thumb_down -13

"I see!" said the blind man, as he picked up a saw and hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I am iron man 24 flavors in my van i am the icecream man i have met jackie chan

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the Chinese man fall down the stairs? He was shot in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did Robert Kardashian say at O.J.'s most recent trial? Nothing. He died of esophagal cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -13

2 brothers were arguing, both had anger problems to the point where one started war with the other. Boy1: I HATE YOU Boy2: MOM HATES YOU Boy1: ....Wait why? Boy2: YOU WERE AN ACCIDENT SHE TRIED TO SELL YOU TO A MEXICAN AND HE SAID THAT THING WAY TOO DAM UGLEH ITD BURN THE FACES OFF MY COWS.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what do you call 3 mexicans in the back of a car? Carpooling to work to save on gas.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: What do you call an exact duplicate of Homer Simpson who's been enhanced with numerous special powers and a strength-boosting inducer among other beneficial additions? A: A mobidly overweigth individual who hasn't realized what the phrase, "Go on a diet", even denotes/implies.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats brown, large, thick, and sticky? a stick

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops