One night a policewoman pulls over a drunk driver. She politely asks him to step out of his car. He willingly does so. She says, "Anything you say can and will be Held against you." He replies "BREASTS."

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Why does Matt Daly do in his free time? it involves his finger and his own buttwhole

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What happened when the dinosaur walked into a lake? It got wet

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Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

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Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

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When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

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The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

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Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills.

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why did the Japanese father cry? because when america bombed japan in wwll it happened to kill the rest of his family

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

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How do you scare a black man? Burn his house down.

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Knock Knock. Who's there *gun shot*

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Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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two mexicans are in a car, who's driving one of the mexicans!!!

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What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

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joe galasso from plainview ny

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What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

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Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and way, along came a spider who sat there beside her and asked, "Hey bitch what's in the bowl?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops