A human walked into a bar, The bartender quacked, "quack quack quack" The human wondered why all the patrons and the bartender were ducks, so he left the bar, before his head spontaneously exploded.

why did the boy die he had a raging case of cardiovascular disease

how many people with ADHD does it take to screw in a light bulb? wanna go ride bikes

Whats worse than Justin Bieber's love life. My ass crack.

Why was Timmy crying when he got home? His family was dead in a pile with a pitchfork going through each of their bodies

Why did the car slow down? Becuase the driver pressed the break

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

how do you piss off a dyslexic? give him a crossword puzzle

Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Smith.

What's 9 + 10 19

What is brown and green and goes 100 mph? A tree falling down on your house.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

How many fingers am i holding up? none, my hand got blown off in Vietnam

oh no a butt!!!!!!!!!! your stubid oh wait your right ahhhhhhhhhh

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares, it's a chicken.

Jim has five apples. He gives two apples to Joe. What is left? Fruit

Three men walk into a gay bar, and have a great time because they're all of consensual age and brought condoms for safe sex.

What did little Timmy do in the Library? Read

What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? The bench can support a family of 4?

Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has insomnia.

- Knock Knock - Who is it ? - I'm a Jehovah witness - Sorry, I don't know anyone by the name of "a Jehovah witness". Bye.

Why couldn't the T-Rex give anyone a high five? Cuz he's dead.

Knock Knock. *silence* Knock Knock.

Pacient: Doctor Doctor i think im becoming a vegetable... because of my heriditory bone marrow mutation

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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