A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

What do you call a man with a sack of money running from a bank? A rich man.

why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

What do you call a muslim with an RPG? Holy Shiite

A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

what is pink and fluffly? pink fluff

What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

what do you call a gay kid? KIRK, SAV, FRANK, or even KIRKLE THE TURTLE

A fish walks into a bad Fish dont walk

What's the difference between a duck? An armchair, because a vest has no sleeves.

Whats worse than the Halocaust? Your mom

What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

What's the difference between a duck?

Women's Rights

Q: What's the Difference between Judaism and Catholicism? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

What's sad about a house on fire?, it was my house.

what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

Me: Knock Knock! You: Door's Open!

Who Lives in a Pineapple Under the Sea? No one, its physically impossible to live in a fruit and breathe under water

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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