you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

What happened to the Caucasian man who went to Vegas? He lost all his money so the government took away his car and his house so he had to become homeless and live on the streets begging for money from any who walked by until he slowly starved to death after eating food left in restaurants and trashcans.

give my joke a thumbs up Please!!!

What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

Women are like puzzles. Because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don't

hrih

hi

What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

What do you do to someone you hate very much? You kill them.

Q: What happened to Michael Jackson yesterday? A: Nothing.

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

how do you stop a baby crying hit it with a brick.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

What did the thief get for Christmas? Nothing. He was sentenced to the death penalty.

Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "MOOOOO!". The other makes an unremarkably similar noise.

A man walks around a bar.

Obama 2012

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Come in" "Come in who?"

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Actually it couldn't even walk because of all the hormones they injected into it in order to genetically enhance it's size and flavor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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