What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

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Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

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A guy walks into a bar. He then comes home at 4 a.m. to beat his wife.

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Jon has 40 chololate bars, he eats 32, what does he have now? Diabetes.

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2+2= 478

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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Why was the little boy sad? He tried to dry off his puppy in the oven.

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women's rights

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? Aye, ye be thinkin' it to be "ARRRR" - but it be the C

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What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

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What's more stinky than a fart? More farts.

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How do you tell if someone is a Jew? Ask them politely.

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Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

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Knock Knock! Come in.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens are raised on farms, which are away from society. They are taken care of in pens, and have no way of escaping. Therefore it couldn't have crossed any roads.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

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wat does T.J.C.S. Mean? leave an comment to answer

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What did the Spanish immigrant say? Olah.

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Where did all the time go? In a recent study, 100% of all time, all systems go.

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What do you call a pig standing on its back legs? Yo mama

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why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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