Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

What did the black boy get for christmas? An Xbox.

Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I like to sniff your hair when you are asleep.

Women's Rights

A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

3 jews are walking into a bar. the first jew orders a shot of vodka, drinks it and says "long live my family!" the second jew orders a shot of whiskey, drinks it and says "long live my friends" the third jew orders water, because he is the one that is driving tonight.

What's sad about a house on fire?, it was my house.

Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

This comment is anti to jokes.

Two cannibals are eating around a fire in the jungle, and one turns to the other and says "Does this taste funny to you?" Oh yeah, and they're eating a clown.

your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

knock knock who's there ? dogs dogs who? phone

I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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