One time, I ate 3 chipotle burritos....after a tennis match

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

thumb_up thumb_down -8

(in a retarted voice) i want to go to disneyland

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What goes in long and hard and comes out wet and sticky? A penis after orgasmic intercourse.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What rhymes with you? You.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

thumb_up thumb_down -20

26.5% of Americans are obese.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What happens when a japanese boy goes into a planet called Zypharecion which is 2000 light years away with 20% oxygen and 78% nitrogen and 2% of other earthly air elements and heats up a balloon enough that it explodes? He wont be at that planet because it does not exist and travelling at the speed of light has not been proven possible for humans.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What did the priest do when he noticed the young boy bent over picking up crayons he had dropped? He helped him pick them up

thumb_up thumb_down -60

My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

thumb_up thumb_down -60

What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +55

what did the duck say to the chicken .nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +51

I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

roses are red, violets are blue when ever l flush the toilet i think of you

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken? His name.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

thumb_up thumb_down +29

YouTube comment: If I get a cent for every pixel on the screen. I would have... $960 for a 224p video $2049.6 240p video $1296 for a 270p video $2304 for a 360p video $4099.2 for a 480p video $9984 for a 520p video $9216 for a 720p video $20736 for a 1080p video $125829.12 for a 2304p video ... I would be RICH!!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops