Why did the fireman wear suspenders? To keep his pants up.

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Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

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What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

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Why did the black man shoot everyone? Because he is black

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What's that smell? Your feces droping in the toilet

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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why was the dog barking?? bryan is a douche..... get it troupe.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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What is pink and smells like green paint? Pink paint

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What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

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how do you stop a baby crying hit it with a brick.

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If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

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Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

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Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

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What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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YouTube comment: If I get a cent for every pixel on the screen. I would have... $960 for a 224p video $2049.6 240p video $1296 for a 270p video $2304 for a 360p video $4099.2 for a 480p video $9984 for a 520p video $9216 for a 720p video $20736 for a 1080p video $125829.12 for a 2304p video ... I would be RICH!!

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Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

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Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

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What's the difference between a large pizza and a black man? The pizza is a delicious Italian classic dish, while the latter is a human being which man frown at the notion of consuming.

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Want to hear a joke about Potassium? So do I.

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what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops