A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

knock! knock! who's there? mom mom who? your mom... your girlfriend just died in a car accident while carrying you baby...

Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

if a black man, a Chinese man, and an Indian were about to jump off the Eiffel tower, who would hit the ground first? who cares?

How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

Why did the chicken cross the road? there were no more cars in the way

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

How did the cat die? I just it nine times

Hi

What's the difference between donuts and dead babies I don't have a pile of donuts in my garage

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The brunette and the redhead escape, but the blonde is captured. Why? Because she had a prosthetic leg sustained from a previous injury, and thus couldn't run very fast.

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

Chuck Norris can watch TV.

What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

what is the difference of a duck..... it neither wears tie.....

How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

What do you call a black man and woman with a little white girl? A Family.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

Women's Rights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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