What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

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After a long day on the movie set, Lindsay Lohan decides to go out to a bar. She gets really drunk and high on drugs and some guy takes her back to her trailer and stuffs her muffin.

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Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

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Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

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why did the banana go to the doctor? answer: he wasnt peeling well lollolololloololololololololololololooolololololololol i just fell of my dinosaur

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Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

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What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

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girl says..joe..................................................................... boy says...who is joe................. girl..the idiot of a helper at my skl

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How do you make a man sit down? Hold him at gunpoint.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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Kony 2012

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Your momma's so fat...

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What happens when some one breaks apart your little brother's lego tower? You have a screaming little brother and a bunch of legos all over the floor.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

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roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

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What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

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What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

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What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken? His name.

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Q: How do you get a bunch of mexicans attention? A: Say excuse me, can I have your attention please?

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Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

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Two elephants are in a bath tub. The first elephant says to the other elephant, "can you pass the soap?" The second elephant then replied, "No soap, radio."

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Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

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Why don't Polish girls swim in the sea? The only sea that Poland borders on is the Baltic. Throughout most of the year this sea is too cold to comfortably swim in.

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Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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