well it rained all night the day i left, the weather it was dry, i can't remember the words but susana don't you cry oh susana don't you cry for me for i come from alabama with a banjo on my knee oh

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Why was six afraid of seven You would be scared to if your name was six and you knew someone named seven

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

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Why did the golfer take an extra pair of pants to the golf course? In case they ripped and he needed a replacement.

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What did the orphan say to the other orphan? Annie is my favorite movie.

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A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

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live or die you decide to late time to die

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A fat man on a moped

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Where do you put a black jew? In the back of the.... oh wait i have never seen a black jew before.

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A blind man walks into a bar Backs up, and walks around it.

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why did the blond stare at a carton of orange juice for 2 hours? because she was reading the nutrition list, and she is a slow and patient reader.

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Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

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Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

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Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

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What do birds need when they're sick? Medical attention

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

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What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

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pedophile

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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